slipping back into wanting to binge and purge. i started WW and was doing good. then i failed and started pigging out. now im stressing about grades cuz im afraid ill get kicked out and im feeling fatter than ever! bulimia has always been my crutch and im wanting to lean on it. i dont even feel like fighting it now. i miss the feeling. i miss when my ED was at its worst and i was thinner. i want that thin back. i wasnt happy...but shit, at least i wasnt fat!
btw the national eating disorder awareness week is next week. i made a bulimia recovery bracelet...i think i need to change it...
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Talk to your therapist. If you don't have a therapist, please get one, and talk to him/her about your feelings.
ReplyDeleteOf course, since I've "been there", I know that you will only seek help when you're ready. :-(
I hope that you're ready soon.
I have a therapist but havnt seen her in over a year. I was in Intensive Outpatient and left a week early because it wasn't working. I then left therapy soon after cuz I shut down. It takes a lot to go back to therapy for me. I don't know if Ill ever truly be ready for recovery. :(
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